Show Me The Way
by Wicked R
Summary: alternate ending to “The Importance of Being Phoebe”, season 5 of Charmed, but not how you think. ColeK. Don’t recoil. Cole was miserable. Somebody had to make it easier for him.
1. Default Chapter

Title: Show Me The Way  
Author: Wicked R  
Disclaimers: characters and the universe belongs to the WB.

Rating: PG.

Genre: Angst/Romance.

Summary/Set/Pairing: alternate ending to "The Importance of Being Phoebe", season 5 of Charmed, but not how you think. Cole/K. Don't recoil. Cole was miserable. Somebody had to make it easier for him.

Cole listened to Phoebe, "you just don't get it, Cole, do you? I thought you were dead and I felt nothing. No pain, no love, nothing. I'm free. And when we do vanquish you, and we will, I'll never look back," he looked at her sorrowfully, tears starting to flow from his eyes and because he couldn't take anymore of Phoebe's refutation of him at the time, he shimmered out.

Kaia's voice startled him in his own penthouse, "she's not by your side I see."

Cole ignored her, too tired from his emotions to bother to send an energy ball towards her to get rid of her. Instead, he stepped to his drinks cabinet and took a bottle of tequila out. He didn't trouble himself with glasses either, he just gulped down half of the bottle, then sat down on his sofa with it in his hand. Not even alcohol affected him as much as it had before he became all powerful. He needed a lot more of it to start to forget, so he thought, he better get a move on and took another quarter of the bottle, "want some?" he lifted the bottle up in the stripper's direction. If he didn't kill her, at least he could use her as company. He wasn't in a destructive mood anyway. He wasn't sure what damage he could do on the world, if he used all his powers at the same time, he maybe could've been able to destroy California by sheer will, but if not all the state, he could've made San Francisco disappear for sure. Except that it just seemed too much effort and would've achieved nothing. On the contrary, it would've killed Phoebe as well. She wasn't going to be his, she hurt him on purpose, she never really understood him with her judgemental crap. It would've made sense on some level to simply end it that way. But that would've been evil. And no matter how much Phoebe didn't believe that, no matter he was the leader of the underworld again, he wasn't evil. He was so tired of trying to prove that, so tired of life, sick and tired of…

"Yes," the blonde agreed, thinking if she had some of the bottle, maybe Cole wouldn't drink as much. But instead of Cole pouring her some drink, a glass materialised in her hands to Cole's slight movement of one of his fingers.

"What do u want from me Kaia? I ain't no prince on fancy horse. I might be the current leader of the underworld, but I don't know for how long with my current rate of killing off demons," in fact, he didn't know why he was still around. He was a monster, inadequate and pathetic, and he didn't belong anywhere anymore. He wasn't human and he wasn't a demon. His body didn't let him die, but in fact he was dead. He heard Phoebe's words in his mind over and over again, and he didn't even want to belong in the world anymore. And on top of it all, he couldn't kill himself.

"I wanna help," he heard Kaia's voice.

"Ok," he replied softly, giving up, letting life unfold as it wanted. What he wanted he couldn't have. Nothing else mattered.

"You want me to…to help you?" Kaia was in fact surprised and unsure what to do.

Cole gaped down at the floor, "yes," he whispered. Anything, to end this horror in his mind.

"You want me to be Phoebe?"

"No," his hand shot up and he shook her in panic, "I wanna forget. Help me forget."

Kaia swung her legs around his waist, her lips settled solidly on his. Cole started to move his hips and wished themselves in the bedroom.

Cole woke up with a small cry in the darkness of his bedroom, his tears stinging his eyes. He lay motionless for a second to realise what was going on, then hurried to the bathroom as he realised that the couple of bottles of strong alcohol he had at night were too much for his system as well. When he could finally concentrate on his still uncontrolled emotions, he pulverized the sink with his fists, then fell down onto the floor sobbing. He only glanced up as two arms enfolded him and he allowed Kaia to hold him tightly against her chest.

"That bitch did this to you," Kaia said bitterly, but half expecting to be punished immediately for calling the witch a bitch.

However, nothing happened until Cole managed to control his tears in a few minutes, "I had everything," he said, his voice still stifled, "I had everything I ever wanted, and it just...it slipped through my fingers like sand."

"I know," Kaia fixed her gaze on the night sky through the small window of the bathroom, "and you've given in to sorrow and let it take your life. Pain all you have," Cole looked up at her questioningly, never have given the shape shifter the benefit of having wits for her looks, "I understand what suffering is, I know how it feels when you're terrified and unable to cope with life because it hurts too much," she paused, then decided to tell him her age followed by a tiny smile, "I'm three hundred years old. I lost my family to the Source. My whole family, and that is including the love of my life. So wherever you wanna go, that's fine by me. Whatever you want. Just don't tell me you want Phoebe. Forget Phoebe. I can't…" She stood up and stepped back. For a single, timeless moment, their eyes met and she could see that deep inside, there was a hint of gratitude in him towards her, "I'll go if you want," then she was gone.

Cole knew he would look for her. Soon.

The End.


	2. Secure

Chapter 2: Secure

Dr. Anthony Kindersley, known to the world as the young head of the St. Mary Psychiatrist Hospital in San Francisco, shot his office door to take the chance and figure out the course of appropriate action to be taken with one of his patients. He just attended a case conference with his colleagues about a young man, during which they diagnosed him as being psychotic and decided what drugs to give him. Anthony on the other hand, carrying the witch gene he received from his father, possessed the ability of mind reading at touch of the head and was well aware of the fact that their patient was in fact a lower level demon without the power of shimmering. He had to decide how to vanquish him without making his disappearance peculiar in the public eye. He was hoping, that his long time girl friend and now fiancée would have a good idea, as she always did. Thinking about Phoebe Halliwell took his mind off from the case though and he started wondering about the chances of their personal happiness. It would've been, a match made in heaven. They were both witches, part of the same world, with similar powers, helping each other out not just against the demons, but also with the emotional roller coaster that their lives created, especially by the uncomfortable experience of visiting other people's minds. It would've been a match made in heaven if it wasn't for him sensing some suppressed thoughts Phoebe had about her ex husband occasionally. Anthony knew that Cole was the love of her life, that only one in a lifetime experience and he couldn't compete with that. He understood that the demon will always have a special place in his fiancée's heart, and he was ok with that. What he didn't like was the occasional passing thought Phoebe had when she wondered what would happen if she met Cole now. Her ex had disappeared several years back, right after he tried to win her back by taking the shadow into him. They knew he wasn't the leader of the underworld anymore, but nothing indicated to his existence, even though he had to be somewhere, he was invincible after all. Taking everything into consideration, Anthony had suggested Phoebe should contact Cole before the wedding. It was better to find out about the big factor in whether their marriage was going to be a success or not, sooner, rather then later. With the impending action, he dialled Phoebe's number apprehensively. He got the machine, telling him the line was busy.

------------------------------

Phoebe pressed in the first digits of a law firm's telephone number in Boston, Massachusetts, then paused, suddenly very anxious and unsure if she was doing the right thing. Cole left her alone for over five years and who knows what muddling the waters could cause. But she had to do this. As she couldn't hide her stray thoughts from her fiancé, she hurt the psychiatrist quite badly and there was only one way of fixing this, by finding Cole and proving to everyone, including herself, that her life wasn't in fact on hold, waiting for the return of her ex. Summoning the demon would've not been the appropriate way of avoiding a conflict. If she scryed for him, he would've sensed it too, besides, they had tried it before and I didn't work. Cole was powerful enough of a demon to be able to conceal his location. The only other option was asking Darryl to look for him and indeed, he had been successful at locating a certain Coleridge Benjamin Turner, attorney, partner at Sorensen, Turner and Saunders, specialising in family law, with its headquarters in Boston. But was Cole over her now? She had to know. Otherwise she didn't feel she had the right to love Anthony for her guilt over ruining Cole's life. She got her guts together once more, hoping it will be the answer machine only that will answer her call. It was. She left a message that she needed to see him, and gave a place and time to meet him, hoping that this Cole Turner was somehow a different person, one that hasn't got a clue who a woman called Phoebe Halliwell would be, but as she disconnected the line, her ex started materialising in front of her already.

"What is your problem, Phoebe?" He growled at her angrily, "can't you let a thing lie? You figured out a way to vanquish me? Or wait, better, what are you gonna accuse me of now?"

"Nothing, nothing. It's just…yeah, I wanted to catch up with you, you know, as in what have you done in the last few years?"

"What have I done?" Cole looked at her sceptically, "so you do blame me of something? What is it that I have done? Spit it out so I can deal with the demon responsible and get on with my life."

"It's not like that. I honestly don't have any accusations."

"What then? Don't tell me you were keen on some small talk with me, or that I have the duty of giving account about my life to a witch."

"It's rather odd that a demon of your magnitude doesn't do anything for that long."

"Ah! So! You are accusing me of something."

"Why is it so hard to believe that I would like to know if you're okay?"

"Why? Because you don't feel anything towards me? Remember?"

"Come on Cole, you had certainly spied on me in the meantime, but you have completely disappeared off the radar."

"I spied on you? Set your self admiration a bit lower, honey, I have other things to do. Besides, I can't keep an eye on witch activity if one of my main ambitions in life is to steer away from powers and anything to do with the underworld."

"Really? No powers? You just shimmered."

"I was managing not using my powers very well, thank you very much, until you showed up. More to the point, I'm not taking away the ability to shimmer from my kids either, they need an escape route even if I bound their other powers."

"Your kids?"

"Two boys."

"Other powers?"

"Fire balls, shape shifting, time travel…"

"Shape shifting?…Their mother is…"

"A demon. I believe you met?"

"Oh, no, no, don't tell me it's that smutty me aspirant? That's absurd, not to mention sick, sick…"

"You mentioned that before. Kaia has not assumed your form for five years, not that is any of your business. Now what the bloody hell do you want from me?"

"Your forgiveness," Phoebe suddenly admitted, completely changing the tone, "I wanna know that you're not suffering because of this still."

It was what he always wanted. For her to come looking for him and tell him that. He expected that everything will change then, but it didn't seem to. It still hurt, "so your dippy conscience needs closure and I have to take the rap for it as well?"

"I might just wanna know that you won't appear back to spoil everything now that I'm going to get married next week," she responded to his angry voice, for him not acknowledging that she gave in and admitted fault, when it was something she would never think she would do, not even for herself.

"All right, Phoebe. It's over between us. Is that what you wanted to hear?" He paused and looked into her eyes, seeing resentment and real remorse in them. He stepped close, gently stroking a stay hair out of her face.

Slowly, she moved to lift her arms and encircle him with them and for a long moment, they clung to each other, lengthening those eternal moments they used to spend with each other. It felt as if not one day would've passed since they had spent their first night together. Phoebe sighed and looked up at him with concern, "are you okay?"

Cole nodded, "I'm okay. Really. I'm happy. Kaia is very good to me. I want you to be happy too. Can you do that Phoebe?"

"Now I can," she smiled, tears strolling down her face as she let him go.

They held each other's gaze as he shimmered out. There was no need for either of them to mention that their distinct worlds would never let them be together, even if they wanted that. But at least, they acknowledged that's how it was and learned to live with it.

The End.


End file.
